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2 GROWN MEN vs a 40 YEAR OLD HOUSE

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Capitol T, and that Rhymes with P

Posted by James on July 5, 2022
Posted in: New Home, Projects. Tagged: Backyard, Fiberglass Pool, Pools123. 8 Comments

If y’all know your Robert Preston/Shirley Jones musicals then you already know that “P” stands for

POOL!

That’s right. We took the plunge (sorry) and got a pool.

After interviewing with about 30 pool companies, (No lie. The ones that bothered to return emails and phone calls anyway,) we finally met with Pools123.

We knew we wanted a pool… but weren’t really sure what kind of pool we wanted.

Apparently it was a “plunge” pool – that means it’s too small for diving but just the right size for a couple of old dudes to cool off in.

And Pools123 had just that. We choose the Harmony model; 10′ X 20′ X 5′ deep – just the right scale for the size of our humble yard.

This is the pic of the Harmony from the Pools123 catalog.

Beautiful, right?

Since their pools are all fiberglass the installation is so fast and even better yet economical.

Two details we’re always looking for.

Let’s start at the very beginning, here’s the plan that Pools123 did for us…

and the actual space we were working with…

(Please ignore the curious boxer in the pic – it’s nearly impossible to take any pictures without a dog, or even two dogs, insisting on being into the shot.)

When we returned from Puerto Rico last July, this pile was waiting for us.

Hard to believe that this was all the equipment they needed. But it was.

It was a warm Monday morning in late July when the crew arrived and marked off the digging spot in blue.

Clearly we got to keep the tree, the solitary tree in our backyard, but the post for the hammock wasn’t quite so lucky.

When the backhoe arrived, I sat on the deck and watched the entire dig.

Honestly, I think it took about 45 minutes.

He would scoop and then twirl the backhoe to unload into a dump truck waiting behind him in the alley.

When the guys were satisfied with the size and shape of the hole, they filled it with a layer of pea gravel to level off the bottom.

That little ledge on the right is where the bench part of the form will rest.

They then used the same backhoe to “crane” the pool through our alley, into the backyard, and lowered ever-so-gently into place.

Here’s an interesting fact about fiberglass pools, they fill them with water before backfilling the ground around them to keep them from warping. Those struts in the middle of the pool are part of that structure system too.

Who knew?

Here’s where we landed at the end of day two.

The next step was clay.

Lots and lots of beautiful red clay to lay the foundation for the concrete deck.

So, this is where we went slightly off script…

and kind of expanded the concrete deck…

just a little.

Ok, maybe we extended the concrete deck A LOT.

If you scroll back up and check the original plan you’ll see there was only supposed to be a 3 foot border of concrete around the pool.

And, you know, I was going to build “something” to extend the deck.

But this just seemed right.

I have to admit that I was a little nervous about turning our entire backyard into a sea of concrete

Jamie had the concrete guys stamp our initials into one of the corners with a branding iron.

After the crew trenched and ran electricity for the pool pump, it was my responsibility to replace my pea gravel and concrete paver pathway to the tool shed/potting bench.

Of course, there was also sprinkler repair and new sod laid. We have two big dogs that need a place to run, play and (ahem) poop. Even though they both prefer to poop in the pea gravel.

I also replaced the missing fence sections and re-stained the entire fence with a coat of Russet stain so everything looks fresh.

Ohhh, and I built a smaller version of our fence to hide the pool equipment, with a completely removable front panel for easy access.

Huge improvement, I know.

We can’t thank Pool123 enough for the ease, and speed, of making our humble backyard into the oasis we always knew it could be.

As a quick reminder, here’s what the backyard looks like just about 12 years ago…

and the relaxing space that we’ve created since….

No comparison, right?

I know which yard I’d rather spend my time in.

As always, there’s still a few more projects to finish the space; like a little landscaping, maybe a few new furniture pieces, a kegerator would be nice, or even French doors installed off the living room and master bedroom.

Stay tuned.

But, in the meantime…

“POOL PARTY AT THE CAVENDER HOUSE!”

It’s going to be a great summer.

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Christmas in New York: 2021 Version

Posted by James on December 26, 2021
Posted in: Christmas, New Home. Tagged: Christmas, New York Christmas, New York December, Polo Bar. 12 Comments

Yes, I realize that Christmas was a couple months ago at this point,

But I really wanted to share our trip, and the handful of the quintessential New York touristy things we did;

Like visiting the top of the Empire State Building.

There are actually 3 different observation decks on the top of the Empire State Building, and we hit them all.

Each smaller,

higher,

and slightly more fear-inducing than the last.

I believe you can see the Archer hotel – where we stayed a few years ago on our last New York trip – just over Jamie’s right shoulder seam.

Spent a day slowly wandering around the Museum of Modern Art.

Skip the Met Folks, this is where it’s at.

Wyeth, Picasso, Monet, Frieda, Polock, T.C. Cannon, Hopper, Warhol;

I honestly didn’t know that Van Gogh’s Stary Night was there…. I just turned a corner and there it was.

I think it’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen in person.

A close second place would be the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center.

It wouldn’t be Christmas in Manhattan without the department store windows, this is what I do for a living after all, and the Holiday windows at Bergdorf Goodman never disappoint.

Since we each pick a couple activities whenever we travel, and Jamie has always wanted to take a helicopter tour of the city, we booked a tour with Manhattan Helicopters.

It was a hazy morning when we started, and we could just make out the outline of the Empire State Building through the fog. But all this burned off nicely as we rounded the Statue of Liberty and the lowest part of downtown.

If you ever have the chance, I highly recommend it. The entire tour lasted about 15-20 minutes but we both agreed that it was definitely worth the money. Be sure to book it in advance though.

Now it was my turn.

I’ve always wanted to go skating in Rockefeller Center and we’ve never had a chance before because the limited amount of tickets sell out pretty quickly.

Not this time, we bought our tickets in November.

Turns out that neither of us is a very good skater.

But that’s not the point of skating in Rockefeller Center, now is it?

Even though it was bitter cold – for a couple Texans – we wandered through Central Park and ate various crap off of food carts.

Not everything we ate was off a sketchy food cart, we had Christmas Eve diner at the Polo Bar.

I have better manners than to shoot off a bunch of random pics in a restaurant, but it was pretty exciting and I did manage to get a few stealthy pictures.

Like the heat-stamped ice cube in my cocktail. (Notice the polo mallet stir stick too)

And the chocolate pudding cake we shared for dessert.

It was a short trip, and over much too soon, but one we won’t soon forget either.

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Cavender Christmas 2021

Posted by James on December 24, 2021
Posted in: Christmas, House Tour, New Home. 27 Comments

It just wouldn’t feel like Christmas without a house tour.

Even if we’re not home this year, we still wanted to open our home.

I found a set of these red Noma bells at an estate sale a while back and knew immediately what I’d do with them. Four more sets and a box of “blinkers” later and I swear our front door has never looked so festive.

The big tree this year is entirely American unsilvered glass World War 2 era ornaments.

When silver nitrate – used to make ornaments reflective – was deemed unnecessary during the war, the ornament designers countered with hand-painted details and colors that look like stained glass…. especially when the sunlight shines through them.

If you look closely, you’ll notice that some of them even have pieces of tinsel inside and a few have paper caps and hangers – those are the absolute rarest.

On the mantle is my ever-growing collection of plastic Santas.

Made by companies like Union, Miller, Empire, Rosen and Rosbro. Most of these are dime store candy containers.

One of them is even a baby rattle.

My Rosbro snowmen candy containers have been moved to the coffee table with a vase of Kentlee glass candy canes.

There’s a smaller tree filled with quite a few early Corning-made ornaments. These were designed by the Stuben glass division of Corning. The designers looked for inspiration from German imports, but their deco shapes were more streamlined and decidedly American looking.

I’m completely obsessed with finding them.

The C-6 cone lights and punched tin reflectors are from the 40s too. They heat up pretty quickly, so I have them on a tabletop dimmer.

There’s a third tree in the living room

This one’s even more 1940s ornaments; mostly early stencils and hand-painted designs.

If you’ll look closely, you’ll see there’s also a flock of Santas.

I’m pretty sure they were made by the Coby Glass Company.

Anyhoo…. Scooby,

And the rest of us wanted to wish y’all a Very Merry Christmas.

And a Shiny & Brite New Year!

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San Juan, Post-Covid

Posted by James on July 27, 2021
Posted in: New Home. Tagged: Cascadas Saltos, Del Morrow Fortress, El San Juan Hotel, El Yunque Rainforest, Old Town San Juan, Puerto Rico, Rio Espiritu Santo Waterfall, San Juan. 5 Comments

It’s so unbelievably nice to be able to travel again.

Puerto Rico may sound exotic, but it’s still part of the United States, and entering was relatively painless.

We simply uploaded our vaccination cards, and checked in daily with a local health app.

We’d been there about 9 years ago, with our dear friends the Pecks, and spent a single night before our Caribbean cruise. That one night was enough to convince us that we had to come back and spend more time.

So very glad we did.

We landed in sunny San Juan on Tuesday and flew back home Saturday afternoon.

Perfect amount of time for us to…

Visit the Castillo San Felipe del Morrow Fortress, (that has been guarding the port of San Juan for centuries)…

And waddle around the blue cobble-stone streets of Old San Juan…

And, of course, enjoy mojitos and soak in the sun on Isla Verde Beach….

And take a day trip to the El Yunque National Rainforest…

And take a cooling dip in the waters of the Rio Espiritu Santo (River of the Holy Spirit) at the Cascadas Saltos waterfall…

And eat mofongo – a local delicacy of smashed plantains and pork in a sweet creole sauce – and drink guava sangria…

I know, right?

GUAVA-FREAKIN’-SANGRIA!

And just plain goof around the resort…

It’s good to be back home,

Where they are currently, as I type this, installing our pool.

But it was also nice to return to a little more normalcy in our lives.

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Christmas on Cavender 2020

Posted by James on December 27, 2020
Posted in: Christmas, New Home. Tagged: vintage christmas, vintage christmas ornaments, vintage ornaments, Vintage Shiny Brite, Vintage Shiny Brite Ornaments. 57 Comments

I know, I know… this year’s been a disaster.

I can’t even get my shit together long enough to post my Christmas pictures before Christmas.

Being a hoarder/collector of vintage Christmas, there’s almost always a pile of old ornaments on the kitchen counter, or on the coffee table, and the kitchen counters…

or my desk….

And the floor under my desk….

Anyhoo, since hardly anyone got to see any of this in person, I just had to share with the interwebs.

Enjoy.

The “Big” tree isn’t really that big; it’s only 7 foot.

The bubble lights are modern, I get them on Amazon lately, but the big Japanese lanterns are actually patio lights from the 60s.

Since last year the tree was entirely American glass, this year I crammed it with only European ornaments. About 95% Polish teardrops and reflectors, from companies like Fantasia Glass and Santa Land, that are hand-painted with Santas, snowmen, girls in ballgowns, bells, Poinsettias, and snowy cabins and churches. There’s also a sprinkling of free-blown Italian ornaments, mostly made by the De Carlini family, of all my favorite characters; Mickey/Minnie, Peter Pan, Captain Hook, Linus/Lucy, Tinkerbell, and Frosty.

The Italian Santa topper I found at a rummage sale for $5…. no lie.

And I debated whether or not I needed it.

Obviously, I did.

On the coffee table there’s a mercury-glass bowl that holds glass ornaments all year long.

These are all American, made by Corning Glass in the late 30s and early 40s, and featuring a few of the more unusual shapes; disco balls, grapes, a guitar, American Santa Claus and a few lanterns. My favorite is the square lantern with the stars on the sides.

I started collecting these glass candy canes just a few years ago. They were mostly made in the 1940s by the American company Kentlee.

The little plastic skater next to them is really a candy container made by Rosbro in the 1950s.

On the mantle are a few lighted Santas. The big one is Union and he’s a very hard plastic. The smaller “blow-mold” Santa was made by Empire and is their most popular Santa shape.

These toy Santas are mostly Rosbro candy containers, sold at five and dime stores in the 50s and 60s. The tallest Santa once held a wreath, that’s why he has his arms spread and holes in his hands. (I can’t afford one with a wreath) The second tallest Santa – with the crown – is a “King Santa” made by Harett-Gilmar, he’s a bank.

This table-top tinsel tree is the perfect way to display my 1930s Corning pinecones. Most glass pinecone ornaments were made in either Germany or Japan, and are a little more “organic” looking, so these guys really stand out with their perfect, American deco symmetry.

I absolutely love hunting for them.

On the TV console is a small white “feather” tree with figural light bulbs.

(The Roy Rogers magazine above it is from January? of 1952 and depicts Roy decorating a tree with Shiny Brites)

Once I knew what look for, I find these guys all the time for just a few bucks. They were produced in Japan and I think peaked in popularity in the 1930s. Once one of them stopped working – the whole string stopped working – so most people would hang them as ornaments. Because Santas and bells are a dime a dozen, now I focus on the more unusual characters.

At the other end of the console, next to the photo of our sweet Harley Davidson with a wreath around her neck, is a small styrofoam cone filled with vintage Holiday pins.

Just when y’all think all this stuff is mine… this is Jamie’s collection.

He even found the silver ice bucket it’s in.

The shabby little deer is a vintage bank from Montgomery Wards, the company that invented Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer. (They did, Google it). At one point he had a red light bulb in his nose that would light every time you dropped a coin in his slot. (I can’t afford one with a light-up nose either)

Across the room, next to Christmas cards and plastic Noma bells, there’s a small, dingy tinsel tree crammed – and I mean CRAMMED – with unsilvered striped ornaments. When silver nitrate was rationed during WW2 American ornament companies countered with clear glass ornaments; sometimes with a piece of tinsel inside for sparkle.

The colored lights are C-6 size cones with Diamond Ray punched tin reflectors. Because they heat up so intensely, and I also want them to last another 80 years, I dim them with a table-top dimmer.

The plastic Santa on top seems to ruffle a lot of “vintage Christmas purest’s” feathers because he’s from a completely different decade than the ornaments and lights.

He’s a 1950s Santa Glo tree top or wall plaque.

And as if that weren’t enough options, he also sits flat on a table.

Shiny Brites that didn’t make it onto a tree this year are stacked next to my War-era tree in their 1950’s boxes.

As if you can’t tell… it’s my favorite vintage ornament box.

Even more Shiny Brites fill a glass cylinder on the kitchen table.

The slim tinsel tree in the living room is filled with Premier ornaments. Premier was a small American ornament company that competed with Shiny Brite for almost 20 years. Shiny Brite eventually bought them out and converted several Premier molds to fit their own wider caps. I think their bright colors shine like precious jewels on the silver.

Found this galvanized “Holiday Flowers” tub at a junk store last year. I’m sure it’s from Home Goods or Pottery Barn or some other such place…. but I really like it.

And it works perfectly lifting this tree up another 2 feet.

Here’s even more of Jamie’s collections, ceramic trees.

These were pretty popular in the 60s and 70s.

So that’s our post-holiday house tour.

Hope y’all enjoyed.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

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How I Spent My Summer

Posted by James on October 11, 2020
Posted in: New Home. Tagged: bathroom remodel, Bathroom Remodeling, Why Apex Plumbing Supply Sucks. 9 Comments

So here’s a situation we didn’t expect to be in this soon. 

This was our main bathroom a few short weeks ago.

Not bad,

Not particulary memorable either.

We’ve known about a water leak somewhere, there was always a small puddle on the floor behind the toilet. (No surprise really, the whole bathroom floor slopes slightly towards that one corner.) 

One day the toilet tipped… as if it weren’t even attached to the floor… and we knew we’d better address the situation immediately. The broken toilet had to go. We’d been planning to replace it with a match to the one in the Master bathroom anyway.

So I grabbed a hammer and a crowbar to find that reason for the loose toilet AND the constant puddle.

No surprise, the toilet wasn’t attached to the floor anymore.

The flange had broken away from the drain pipe. Completely. Probably years ago. See that pipe with a rag stuffed in it? There should be a flange attached to the top of it to hold the toilet to the floor….

and there isn’t.

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Honestly, my first intent was to just to replace/repair as much of the floor as I could, but once I started tearing things out…. I couldn’t stop. The floor tile, the damp MDF underlayment (don’t use MDF as an underlayment. EVER), tar-paper, a layer of linoleum floor (probably original to the house), down to the damp/rotted subfloor. The sink cabinet went next (I’ve never cared for it), the sink, the tile half-way up the walls, ALL of the drywall – down to the studs, everything surrounding the shower,

I was like an unstoppable machine,

until I got to the cast iron tub.

There was no way that beast was moving for us. 

I grabbed a Bagster from the Home Depot ($30 for the bag, about $175 for the company to fetch it once it’s full) and we filled it with bathroom shrapnel in a day. The very same day that our neighborhood’s big trash pick up was.

And the city took it. For FREE.

On to Bagster numero dos. This one was solely for the cast iron bath tub. Our plumber removed the thing and dragged it to the curb, where the scrap metal guy, who regularly patrols our neighborhood, pounced on it in less than an hour.

Our second FREE Bagster removal. 

That constant leak rotted out a good amount of the subfloor. Which we removed.

Once again, we had a reverse-Nevada-ish shaped hole in a bathroom floor.

Benjamin Franklin Plumbing did the work on our other bathroom and I can only think of good things to say about them. Although, this may just be a coincidence, but two out of the last three plumbers had grandmothers die while working for us.

I’m not implying that they were lying.

That’s their karma to deal with.

It’s just that the mortality rate for our plumber’s grandmothers seems to be unexpectedly high.

Plumber Johnny arrived early, and after surveying my damage – and 20 minutes of math in his truck – he came back with a plan of attack. And at a decent price.

You’re hired. 

The only wrinkle was that Johnny couldn’t start for a week…. his grandmother had just died.

No lie.

One week later Johnny returned and removed that tub so I could replace the subfloor with a level layer of plywood. (Sistered up all the old floor joists too for some extra stability)

Who doesn’t like an empty box of a room with limitless possibilities?

Now, I’m probably not the most tech savvy guy – Jamie will enthusiastically tell y’all about my flip phone and foil-covered TV antenna that I had when we met – but in the land of online shopping;

I’m a fearless Viking.

In just under an hour I’d ordered a modern toilet, beveled subway tile, and a new door with a frosted glass insert from the Home Depot. Sink, sink cabinet, and shaving mirror from Ikea. Scored an out of production Ikea faucet for a song on eBay. Can lights, bathroom fan, towel bar, and even a modern/industrial light for over the mirror. The West Elm mirror was the only thing we salvaged from the old bathroom. 

Still needed a bath tub and all the shower fixturing.

So Jamie and I made a trek to Apex Plumbing Supply to survey deep bathtubs and shower fixtures (I’d been demolishioning all day and probably looked a little….. homeless; ratty T-shirt, shoes with holes, and drywall in my hair) where I was promptly met with,

get this shit…

“Did you need something?”

No kidding. That’s honestly how the chick at the showroom greeted me; like I was freakin’ Julia Roberts trying to buy a cocktail dress on Rodeo Drive in the early 90s.

Obviously, everything there was “VERY expensive”.

At least we established who wouldn’t be getting the commission off of our meager purchase. 

While the bitch with the attitude was distracted on the phone with a “real” customer, Ricardo helped us. What he may have lacked in product knowledge, he more than made up for with his people skills.

Here’s the new tub Ricardo had delivered to us.

Beautiful, ain’t she?

And deep. OOOh so very deep.

Especially compared to the 7-inch deep, cast iron “tray” we’d been bathing in for the last 9 years.

Some of us couldn’t wait to try it with water in it..

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There is exactly 67 inches between the studs, and bathtubs come in standard sizes of 60 and 66 inch widths. “The bigger the better”, we thought…… anticipating the major wrestling match to get the darn thing in the space. But I didn’t want that weird 6 inches of wasted space on the left side of the tub.

But ya know what? There was hardly any issue at all. A little wiggling was all it took for us to get her through the door opening and sandwiched perfectly in place.

(I was seriously prepared to remove an entire wall if need be.)

Best part, it weighs about 60 pounds. The glory of fiberglass, ladies and gentlemen.

Plumber Johnny returned again and plumbed the tub drain, then set all the knobs, spouts and diverters for the fixtures. I furred the walls to prep for…..

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Hardie-board. 

Starting to look like a bathroom!

Am I right?

Jamie ran mesh seam tape over all the seams….

Then spread mortar over all the tape and screw heads, to keep them water-tight.

But the real water-proofing is in the Red Guard water-proofing membrane.

Jamie smeared it on all the wet surfaces.

Redguard on bathroom walls

Up Next: Tile.

So, I know what most of y’all are probably thinking. “Here he goes again. 3 years of teasing us with a bathroom remodel with no climax.”

Not this time.

I assure you.

Stay tuned…

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Just Between Us Squirrel Friends…

Posted by James on September 13, 2020
Posted in: New Home. 21 Comments

There was a squirrel nest in the only tree in the backyard, and intricately woven into that ball of leaves and twigs was a long strip of a weathered American flag.

It stopped me in my tracks.

It was like when that dove shit on Dianne Lane in Under the Tuscan Sun.

The squirrels here were decorating with American flags.

They get me.

It was a clear sign to me that that this was the house for us.

That we were home.

Flash forward a couple years to the moment when I caught our back-door neighbor (I like to use the term “Back-Door Neighbor” because it sounds like the title of a 70’s porn) shooting at the squirrels with a pellet gun…

and I just lost my shit on him.

Seriously,

LOST.

MY.

SHIT.

He never said a single word of rebuttal, just stood there staring at me as I loudly ranted; comparing him to Jeffrey Dahmer and Ed Gein – both of whom tortured and killed small animals as children. I know, I know. I should have held my temper. He did, after all, have immediate access to a gun… it was still in his hand.

But these were MY squirrels. Squirrels that I had names for. I feed them in the winter months leaving pecans along the top of the fence. I talk to them whenever I do yard work, and they talk to me too. They really do. They let me know whenever there’s a cat in the alley. When I chase one out of my fig tree they never hold back their disagreement, chattering loudly at me from a safe distance above our yard, that the figs are just as much theirs as they are mine. 

Which they aren’t.

Yes, of course I should have done the adult thing and apologized to the neighbor for being so overly-emotional – we might be living next to each other for the rest of our lives – but within a month he had sold his house and moved…

…for reasons that I’m relatively sure were completely unrelated to me – the high strung, rodent-loving fag across the alley.

Anyhoo, Jamie saw one of these things on the internets the other day and since I have a butt-load of scrap wood in the garage, ferrel animals that need pampering, and all the free time in the world, I thought I’d give it a go.

I’ve included some basic instructions just incase y’all might wanna try making one of your own.

(I used pressure treated lumber, only because that’s what I had on hand, but you can use whatever wood you like.)

Here’s what ya need to cut;

  • 5 – 1″X2″, 8″ long
  • 2 – 1″X2″, 5 3/4″ long
  • 4 – 1″X2″, 4 3/4″ tip to tip
  • 2 – 1″X1″, 9 1/2″ long

Breakdown of Pieces for Squirrel Picnic Table

Start with the table top, Line up 3 of the 8″ boards, table top planks, with a 1/4 inch spacing between them.

In case y’all are wondering how three 2 inch boards lay on top of a 5 3/4 inch board with space between them, it’s important to point out that a 2 inch wide board is really 1 3/4 inches wide – wood shrinkage, apparently. “Why don’t they just cut the wood slightly larger to accommodate for the shrinkage?” you may ask. No clue. It’s been driving me crazy for decades… but every single straight man on the planet just accepts this fact. So let’s move on….

I attached the top cross pieces to the table planks with drywall screws. Be sure to leave distance between the cross piece and the ends of the table planks; 1 inch at one end and 3/4 an inch at the other.

Underside of Picnic Table

Next I built the seats with the remaining 8 inch planks and the two 1X1s. Also leaving 3/4 inch distance on one side and 1 inch on the other. The narrower side will go up against the tree.

Underside of Seat

For the legs, I set my miter saw at 22.5 degrees, that’s one quarter of 90 degrees, and cut 4 of them at 4 3/4 inches long.

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The legs I attached with a brad nailer because I didn’t want to see the screws on my finished table.

Use a Brad Nailer to Connect the Pieces

Then I slipped my seat piece in-between the legs, resting just about an inch from the bottom of the feet, and brad nailed it too.

And here’s my finished table.

Finished Squirrel Picnic Table

The front has a slight overhang, while the back of it is flat so it will hang flush on a tree, or fence, or wherever.

I obviously just screwed mine to the side of our tree, about 8 feet up –

just high enough to really piss of our dog,

and baited it with raw peanuts.

Didn’t take long for Jamie to snap a shot of one of our squirrels enjoying it.

I think this goes without saying, but it’s mounted on our side of the tree and not facing our new backdoor neighbors; Anna and Diego.

They don’t really strike me as the types who would shoot at little animals…

…but I have no intention of helping them with their target practice either.

You’re welcome squirrels.

Now stay out of my fig tree.

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These are a few of…

Posted by James on August 9, 2020
Posted in: New Home. 14 Comments

I’ve lost about 40 pounds in the past couple of years.

Thank you….. Thank you.

Seriously, there’s no need to make a fuss.

I’m proud of me too.

Anyhoo, in the far back depths of the attic were a couple of tubs labeled

“Old Polo Clothes”

It was mostly stuff from the 90’s, that is all much too big for me now. Pieces that I absolutely love and wanted to hold onto but obviously haven’t worn in decades…. and will probably never wear again. So why not list them on the eBay and see if I can find good homes for all this amazing stuff?

(I’ve been having great luck selling old Christmas lately)

So Jamie took a few shots of me modeling the goods in the backyard.

Clearly I’m not afraid of color.

Orange Reversible Flight Jacket

Ebay Sales Collage 2

Linen Golf Sweater with Hawaiian Shorts

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Ebay Sales Collage 1

Royal Blue Rain Coat and Painters Jeans

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American Living Peacoat and Red Dog Shorts

Are you a guy who wears a lot of color?

Or, maybe you know a guy who wears a lot of color?

Or maybe, you just wanna check it out?

You know you do.

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Except for the things that I maybe don’t want to sell.

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Tool Shed 2.0

Posted by James on July 22, 2020
Posted in: New Home, Projects. Tagged: Cedar Tool Shed, Potting Bench, Potting Bench Build, Tool Shed, Tool Shed Build. 31 Comments

Without a doubt our tool shed brings more visitors to our humble little blog than any other project we’ve done.

About 500 – 600 visitors a day, seriously.

…..and then each one of them asks where we bought it without bothering to read the post. (insert eye roll)

Skymall Magazine, 10 years ago… Sorry, they don’t make them anymore.

Well, our sad little shed has seen better days. (same with that potting bench).

The Before Tool Shed and Potting Bench

It’s cute,

…but not very functional.

In fact, it’s too short to fit standard garden tools in.

I’d always planned on building a bigger, better shed; just haven’t had the time.

When I heard that I wouldn’t be working for the month of July, I knew exactly what project I would tackle next.

Started with a new base – I reused the concrete pavers from the path as the floor; I plan on replacing all the small ones with 24 inch squares – I just set them inside a frame made of preasure-treated 2X4s.

Like so…

New Base for Tool Shed with Old pavers

It should be noted here that my construction skills are akin to a 10-year-old building a tree house; not a lot of premeasuring, or planning of any kind really, I just start screwing boards together.

(Always use screws for projects like this. They make it easier to go backwards.)

I knew that the whole structure needed to be tall enough to accommodate tools, so I started the back wall at seven feet.

The Back Wall Structure of New Tool Shed

Now it will easily hold…. a standard garden rake.

I’ve been replacing the aged boards on the cedar fence for the past few weeks and had a stockpile of the old stained cedar that I just couldn’t bare to toss.

Jamie used a power sander to sand the stain off of most of them…

Jamie Sanding Down Reclaimed Boards

And what was underneath was just too beautiful to not use somewhere.

So I used them to line the inside of my shed.

Back Wall of Tool Shed with Reclaimed Cedar

Or the back wall, anyway.

Then I built the 2X4 frames for the sides…

Wall Studs in Place for the New Tool Shed

…and added a roof support.

IMG_6949

Yes, I realize that I’m shaking up the proper order of construction… Most people would build the whole frame first before worrying about the inside walls.

But I got so excited seeing the progress.

Lining the INside Sides with Reclaimed Cedar

Isn’t it just beautiful?

Finished Clading the INside of the Tool Shed with Reclaimed Cedar

It rained the night after I took this picture….

So I should probably figure out the roof.

We had the whole roof replaced on the house about 2 years ago, it was leaking in several spots, and they left us a couple boxes of shingles.

Easy peasy, I just nailed a couple rows on top of a sheet of plywood.

New Roof of Tool Shed with Unused Shingles

I do love consistency.

Miss the old tin roof.…. but I LOVE consistency even more.

Then I added new cedar trim to the outside of the shed with rough fencing cedar.

Outside of New Tool Shed Clad in New Cedar

….and stained everything – except the inside – Behr “Russet” semi-transparent stain.

To match the fence of course.

New Cedar Stained with Russet Stain

Consistency. 

The doors were next. I actually made door frames from some scrap wood we had in the garage.

Adding the Doors to the Tool Shed

I filled them with cedar slats just like…. wait a minute.

I missed a step.

Let’s back up a few weeks.

I’ve never been too thrilled with seeing our air conditioner from the deck.

Side of the HOuse Before I Hid the Air Conditioner

I understand the importance of these machines – especially during a Texas summer – I just don’t want to see it.

And to think, we moved it to this current location. It used to be in the middle of the backyard directly under the master bedroom window. A pretty inconvenient spot since we planned on building a deck stretched across the entire back of the house. And one day French doors from the master bedroom out on to that deck….

But I digress,

Back in June I built a 4 1/2 foot by 6 1/2 foot louvered privacy screen to hide the beast.

I started by setting a cedar post in concrete; something I’ve never done before.

IMG_6615

The other side is a 2X4 mounted to the corner of the house.

Of course, at the same height as my new post.

IMG_6623

I just ran 1X2 cedar strips across….

IMG_6626

… and caped it with a chunky 2X6 cedar plank.

Like so,

IMG_6635

Still lets plenty of air flow to the unit…

AND

…keeps me from seeing the ugly thing from the deck.

IMG_6653

I louvered my shed doors with the same 1X2 cedar strips.

Like so,

Louvered Doors on Tool Shed

Consistency

They aren’t my best work, and will probably get updated in the next year or so, but they look fine for now.

So let’s not dwell on them for too long and move on to the potting bench.

Here’s the view of the old potting bench looking in from the side gate about 7 years ago…

Garden Bench on the Side of the House with Tool Shed

And the same space about 3 weeks ago…

The Shameful Before of our Potting Bench

I know, I know….. it’s pretty embarrassing.

It may just look like a dumping ground, but we honestly do use this space for repotting orchids for the bathrooms and propagating cacti and succelents.

The bench in the top picture is a kitchen island from Ikea. I think y’all know just how long that Swedish plywood/cardboard hybrid thing lasted in the Texas elements…

Maybe a year.

The second potting bench I found in a neighbor’s trash pile; I think it’s the metal frame for a desk. I planned on posting about my find, how we painted it and built the wood top, but I never got around to it. Besides, it was just too short to use as a proper potting bench.

Back to the street it went. (Actually, I gave it to a friend)

Building my own bench, I can customize the height – a standard table is about 30 inches tall, my potting bench will be closer to 40 inches.

I started with a row of 4X4 cedar posts along the wall, with a couple 2X4s connecting them.

The Back Supports of the Potting Bench

It looks like the posts are attached to the house, but they aren’t. The whole piece is freestanding. And since the yard slopes, each post is a slightly different length.

That’s why there’s a level in almost every picture.

So in theory, I could move it. But I’d never want to because on a flat surface this thing would angle drastically down to the right.

In the same vane as the tool shed, there was no real plan, I just kinda kept building it…

The Potting Bench is Starting to Come Together

…mostly out of scrap lumber we had in the garage, staining each piece as I went.

For the lower shelves I used pressure-treated 2X2s.

Rails as Potting Bench Shelf

They’re strong enough to hold heavy pots, and also won’t rot in the elements.

Potting Bench Just Needs Top Now

Plus, they pair up pretty nicely with the louvered doors I made for the shed.

See?

New Tool Shed and Potting Bench

Consistency 

Now, let’s see what all this looks like with a bunch of crap piled on it.

New Tool Shed and Potting Bench Perfection

IMG_7077

Potting Bench Collage 1

New Potting Bench to Pot Ferns

Peeking Around the Corner at the New Tool Shed

Potting Bench Collage 2

IMG_7069

Such an improvement.

Wanna see the organizational perfection happening inside the tool shed?

I know you do.

BA-BAM!

Supe Organized Inside Tool Shed

Isn’t it just yard tool heaven?

A place for everything, and everything in its place.

Way, more, much better than what we had before.

On to the next project.

 

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Beck, I Hear You Calling

Posted by James on July 18, 2020
Posted in: New Home. Tagged: Beth, KISS Beth, KISS Destroyer, KISS Destroyer Album, Paul Lind 1976 Halloween Special, Peter Criss. 3 Comments

Maybe it’s just the extreme boredom lately, but I thought I’d delve into the interesting history of one of my favorite songs.

Beth, by KISS.

(Sure, they “borrowed” the theatrics from Alice Cooper, but how many hard rock bands did they inspire? Marilyn Manson, Motley Cru, Slipknot, Ozzy Osbourne, Metallica, and pretty much every hair-metal band in the 80’s)

I found a clip on YouTube from the 1978 TV movie, KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park.

(Yes, that was an actual movie. You can’t make this shit up, I swear)


Not really the sound that the KISS Army – that’s what their fans call themselves – was expecting from the “Knights In Satan’s Service” in 1976.

Drummer Peter Criss,

alone,

without Paul Stanley

without Gene Simmons

without Ace Freeley,

recorded KISS’ biggest hit. In fact, it’s the only KISS song to not feature a contribution from any of the other band members.

No wonder they hate it. 

Criss was backed by Alice Cooper’s guitarist Dick Wagner. But it was legendary KISS producer Bob Ezrin who had the idea to bring in the New York Philharmonic Orchestra.

I know, just brilliant.

The song was written by Peter Criss and Stan Penridge while they were playing together in the band Chelsea. Only it wasn’t titled Beth in the beginning, it was Beck. Guitarist Mike Brand’s wife, Becky, would constantly call and interrupt Chelsea rehearsals. So much so, that Penridge started taking notes of everything Mike told his nagging wife. He and Criss wrote the song just as a poke in the ribs to poor Mike.

Line for line the lyrics are a conversation between a hen-pecked husband (Mike) and his wife Becky, or Beck.

Beck, I know you’re calling

But I can’t come home right now

Me and the boys are playing 

But we just can’t find the sound

Just a few more hours 

And I’ll be right home to you 

I think I hear them calling now

(I know you like complaining)

Oh Beck, what can I do? 

Beck what can I do?

“Just pause after each sentence and pretend there’s a bitch at the other end of the line. You’ll catch it.” explains Stan Penridge.

KISS Destroyer Album

Even though Paul and Gene fought to keep the song off the album, Destroyer, it was released as the B-side to the album’s third single, Detroit Rock City, in an attempt to bury it.

I mean, who actually listens to B-sides?

Rosalie Trombley’s teenage daughter, that’s who.

Rosalie Trombley was the program director at CKLW in Ontario. Egged on by her teenage daughter, who was obsessed with the B-side, she added Beth to the station’s playlist.

The song was an instant hit, and Casablanca Records quickly re-released it as a single, only this time as the A-side, with Detroit Rock City – Paul and Gene’s song – on the flip side.

It was the fist KISS single to go gold, and even garnered play on adult contemporary stations – GASP!

Something the KISS Army of fans never would have expected.

The song’s television debut was on the Paul Lynd 1976 Halloween Special. (If you haven’t seen it, I HIGHLY recommend that you do. It’s just a perfect example of campy 70’s variety shows.) Criss pretends to play the piano and lip syncs a shortened version of the song.

Oh Hell, you’re not doing anything else right now. Here ya go. Watch this….

In later years, Paul Stanley has made several claims that Peter Criss didn’t realy have much to do with writing the song, and that it was mostly Penridge’s work. “It was a lifeline that Peter hung on to validate himself.” When Criss was fired from the band in 1980 the new drummers, Eric Carr and then eventually Eric Singer, took up performing the song on tours.

Paul Stanley wouldn’t touch it.

Interesting enough, Lydia Criss, Peter’s first wife, claims that she is responsible for the song’s name change from “Beck” to “Beth”.

AND she also claims to have added the last few lines of the song, upset that the band’s success meant that Peter was always on the road touring and rarely home with her, she told him,

“I feel so empty. I feel like this house isn’t even my home.”

And Peter put that in the song.

Doesn’t really matter who wrote it, it’s always been one of my favorite songs.

And now it’s stuck in your head.

You’re welcome.

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